just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
