I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The uberlube is also flammable
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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