i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
