if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
operation have a gay friend backfired
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
