shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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