good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
