Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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