i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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