allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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