she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
