with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
