I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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