we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
