I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
