Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
What a fucking waste of an outfit
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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