You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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