Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
