I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize