I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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