Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
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