are you so shy because you have an std?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
