he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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