Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
