Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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