Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
