I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize
