i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
