Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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