hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
