that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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