She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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