Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize