Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
