It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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