why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
