I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize