Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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