Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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