Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
