Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Randomize
