im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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