He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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