ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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