38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
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