I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You pole danced in your parka.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
