Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize