***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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