I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
