so explain again why im purple
no
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
