Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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